Monday, March 30, 2015
Ok so I always thought that the whole point of having a man live with you and sleep next to you every day was so that you wouldn't have to go far for pleasure.... well I mean I know thats not the whole point but come on I'm 21 I'm freaken hormonal. And Heres the problem I'm engaged.... I mean the problem isnt that I'mm engaged its that my fiance is... well he's..... he always wants to make love. I mean like he just wants to be soft and sweet and gentle and thats not what i want. Not what I need. I crave domination, I crave that overpowering feeling that helplessness and he just doesnt give it to me. i want rough sex, I want to be spanked and man handled and choked and he wants to do missionary and kiss me and dont get me wrong I'm not against the slow sweet love makin but can some one please give this man a copy of fifty shades of grey!
Theres one man at my sucky job that stands out above the rest.... That would be Benji The european playboy. Benji is a five foot 9 gorgeous african -italian, sweet talkin, charismatic, flirtatious embodiment of sexuality. And I mean every word of that. Imagine a semi- tall dark rugged sexy guy with a great build and I walked that says "I know i'm sexy. He has a smile that will make your heart skip a beat and a velvety smooth voice that will leave your panties wet. He says naughty things that will catch you off guard and just his presence will keep you horny. i love and absolutely hate the affect he has on me. It drives me crazy... no I've never done anything with benji but that doesnt mean he doesn't affect me. I think he might affect me more then anyone else. Benji and I spend a lot of time around each other we eat lunch together and hang out together on breaks and yes he affects me but I would never admit it. Benji Makes me fucking melt especoially when hes close to me i feel hot and wet and primal... but of course I'd never tell him that. Remember those naughty girl tendencies I was talking about? Benji sends those into over drive.
I like to think of my self as a good person, I always have and then.... theres that naughty girl feeling. Its somthing that I can't shake something that I've always have had a problem with. I'm a good girl i just have........ thoughts .... naughty thoughts sometimes I mean. Im fucking 21 and surrounded by men most of the day what else do you really expect not to mention I'm the youngest woman in the plant where I work so the air is thick with dirty sexual inuendo from the older men who crave a young just above legal girl like me. Sometimes I can't help the thoughts that run thru my mind, I mean I never act on it but with all the testosterone in the room oh the thoughts I can't help it some times... does that make me a terrible person?